Vices and Addictions

We all have them. Some of us have more than others. I’m probably one of those. No, if I’m to be honest, there’s no ‘probably’ about it. I am *definitely* one of those.

If you have been following along with my blogs for the last several months, you know that my current addiction is KCulture and has been for the last eighteen months. During that time, my friends have asked me repeatedly what it is about my current passion that has led me to become so obsessed – not just listening to KPop but playing in the mosh pit at the concerts; not just watching KDrama but writing one; not just researching the country but visiting it and learning the language. It’s a question that I’ve given a great deal of thought over the past year and a half. Like all kids, I blame my parents.

My parents always told me, “If you’re going to do something, do it right or don’t do it at all!” So, while I never actually *planned* to do any of those things that I’ve done, they have been natural progressions along my path, growing out of where I was at the time. My way of ‘doing it right.’ But even though that is true, it still really doesn’t answer their question. But the truthful answer isn’t all that satisfying. And that is that I’m not sure that I can adequately explain the captivation. I think that may be because every time I start to try, it just seems too big. At this point it’s like the elephant on the plate. So we will just take it one bite - or one (sub)addiction – at a time.

For those who don’t know, KDramas are akin to what we would call a miniseries. I want to stress that they are NOT soap-operas. Though there are some that are melodramas that is where the similarity ends. For one thing, KDramas do not run for decades. It is rare for a KDrama to even have a second season. While not hardly an expert, I would say that the majority of them are between 20-24 episodes which are shown twice a week. Once the story is done, it is done. There is no bringing it back just because it’s popular. In some ways that is one of the most annoying things about KDrama – you spend three months growing attached to the characters and then it’s over even though you want to see more.

Paradoxically, some of the things that I find aggravating about them are also the same reasons that I love them and keep going back for more.

Many of them are cliché and predictable. I call those the “Laws of the KDrama Universe.” For example, Rule #1: The second male lead never gets the girl. While it is a theme of KDrama, it isn’t confined to KDrama. We can relate to it because it parallels reality. As a teacher, I continually see my female high school students fall head-over-heels for the ‘bad boy’ every time while the guy who is always there for them, the one who is always good to them, the one who is always good FOR them gets relegated to friend status. And because it’s familiar, it’s also comfortable. It’s like your favorite pair of jeans – worn out from overuse but they fit so well.

Each episode ends on a cliffhanger. This is the very reason that I prefer to wait until a series is complete and binge watch. That way I can hit the ‘play next’ arrow and not be pulling my hair out until the next episode airs days later. I have made the mistake a few times of watching a current KDrama because it starred some of my favorite actors and have been known to throw my headphones across the room in vexation when the characters are left in whatever plot twist the writers have thrown them. To be continued …. probably the only three words that will set me off in a tirade no matter what language it’s written in.

One of the reasons that I prefer KDrama to American television these days is because the emphasis is on romance not sex. Too often in our media, we use sex to sell a product and even people. This is refreshingly absent in KDrama. Do not get me wrong, there is plenty of sexual tension. And it is precisely that build-up, that delayed gratification, that makes it fulfilling. It is not unusual in KDrama for you to wait twenty episodes for that first kiss. And you have spent the last nineteen episodes screaming at the screen, “Just shut up and kiss her already!” And how sweet and satisfying it is when that kiss finally happens.

Last, but not least, you fall in love for the first time – over and over and over again. Close your eyes. You remember your first love. No one ever forgets them. And with KDrama you get to relive those moments. You get to re-experience all those emotions. And what a wonderful feeling to carry with you and pass along to all those around you.

So, for those of you who have asked (and even if you haven’t), is that a good enough explanation? Or do you still find it lacking? Do you still think it bizarre? Some of my friends have even gone so far as to ask me when I’m going to ‘get over this obsession’.

They say that the first step to recovery from addiction is admitting that you have a problem. Hi. My name is DL and … *THUNK* … so sorry, that was me … missing the step …